Follow these simple rules and you'll be on your way to blogging misery...
1) Forget blogging for yourself. Just blog about what you think other people would want to read about.
2) Just blog for money.
3) Gauge the success of your blog by the number of comments you receive.
4) Freak out each time you receive a negative comment or email.
5) Make the A-List (or some other Top List) your Ultimate Blogging Goal.
6) Allow blogging to become just another chore.
7) Never live outside the blogging world.
8 ) Compare yourself to other bloggers. A lot.
9) Don't attempt to connect with other bloggers in any way or level. No comments. No outbound links. No projects.
10) Expect certain people to visit and/or to comment on your blog.
11) Go on a regular Bloggers' Guilt Trip - for not posting enough, for not living up to your readers' expectations...
12) Follow every single tip or advice you read from various "Blogging Experts".
13) Blog about things that you're not particularly proud of - or interested in.
14) Set unrealistic blogging goals and expectations.
15) Believe that you will only get and encounter good things from your blog.
16) Be obsessed with every single blog metric or statistic.
17) Try to be nice to everyone. Even those who annoy you.
18) Be nasty to a lot of folks. Even those who didn't do anything wrong to you.
19) Pretend to be someone you're not.
20) Stress about the bloody idiots who steal your blog entries and repost them on their blogs without permission or attribution.
Photo by: Rajesh Sundaram (from sxc.hu)
Slightly Edited via Picnik
*Partly inspired by Keri Smith's How to feel miserable as an artist.